May 31 2013


Huge apologies to all of you who have tried to contact me the past two weeks. I have been in hospital. I was rushed in two weeks ago and have spent the whole time in a pain filled morphine haze. I am out now with the news that I have to go back in a month for another set of injections ready for major surgery in the summer. I could have had the surgery now but I have been putting it off for two years and was not giving in just now. I can hold on a couple more months until I feel ready mentally. It is a big Op and not one to just decide on the spot to have. SO I am still umming and arghing even though it has been two years. I must say that it is nice to finally have escaped though. I was going mad in there. I also have enough meds now to kill an elephant or two so I should be back to work on Monday all going well. I really have missed you all so much. Sitting in a hospital bed all alone, (I always get a private room even though I hate them) really gives you time to think about lifes priorities. Mine from now on is going to be family, health and then work. Everything else can take a back burner. I need to get myself into a routine of working every day and not taking time off every time I have a little bit of pain as I know it is part of me now and there is nothing that can be done for it so I might as well work instead of sitting at home thinking about it. It is much more fun and it keeps my mind busy. I have also decided I am giving myself a month to give up smoking as my surgeon will not do my Op via spinal block so I have to be knocked out and the last time I almost died so I wont risk smoking and that again. I am also going to try and lose a stone. A stone wont make much difference to how I look and I will still be curvy BUT I will be healthier and it will put less strain on my lungs during surgery. So guys no choccies ok? As much as I love them, fruit is going to be a much better gift for me. I like most fruit, grapefruit I adore, so instead of a box of chocolates bring me a grapefruit. Ok it doesn't look as good to you but for me it means so much more as it means you have read what I need and prefer and that means so much more than buying the normal chocolate. I also like pears and bananas and I also love celery and carrot sticks. Now I know these don't seem like gifts but to me a gift is supposed to be what the receiver would love and not how much it costs. yes some girls would look at you as if you were crazy turning up without flowers or chocolates and gving them celery but not me. For me it is much better and will make me smile. Anyway I am sure the spelling on this is appalling but I can only blame my medication as it does make me a bit fuzzy when I first take it and I wont be taking it whilst working. I shall take it firs tthing in the morning and then not again until I finish work and am at home where it is safe for me to feel a bit dozy and fuzzy. SO again massive apologies to all who have not been able to contact me but I can be booked now for Monday via email or text as my phone is on silent until Monday morning. WOOHOO I SHALL BE BACK TO WORK AND I CANNOT WAIT